It seems from the moment we left the States, buy cialis or maybe even before when we were raising funds, things have happened left and right to try to keep us from being in Colombia doing the work God’s called us to do. I suppose you would call those attacks from the enemy. And as most close to me know, and I’m sure the enemy knows, my softest spot outside of my husband and children lies with my sister and nephew. One of the hardest days in my life was back in the fall of 1995 when I was leaving for college and my nephew, then just three, was so mad at me for leaving. I had been part of nearly every day of his life and here I was going for what seemed like forever. Since then I have slowly moved further and further away to Atlanta, Costa Rica and now Colombia, but still a huge portion of my heart remains in their hands.

Praise God for the invention of the internet and internet phones because we’re able to talk every day, several times a day via one means of communication or another, but knowing my weakness, I feel like Satan has known how to cut me the deepest. Since we left the States one crisis after another has seemed to follow them. Just recently the devastating loss of two young people in their lives and this very week the loss of a best friend has once again shaken their world to the core. I have to be honest; my hardest struggle being a missionary does not come from lack of American foods or the ability to get things that are a convenience in the States. It didn’t come from whittling down our belongings to the quantity of 12 action packers, security issues or language and cultural differences. My hardest struggle comes from not being able to be there physically with my family when crisis falls. I realize there is not much I could do in person to make any situation better, but it hurts when I just want to give a hug or a smile to signal my support. I don’t mean to imply that their trials are all about me, I’m just stating how their trials affect me.

All that said, in these times of despair when I feel so frustrated and discouraged with my distance, the same song always finds its way into my heart. It is the song that brings me to my knees before God and reminds me to praise Him because it’s all in His hands. I just thought I’d share it on here because it never ceases to inspire me and maybe it will you one day, too.
~Tona

Yet I Will Praise

I will praise You Lord my God
Even in my brokenness
I will praise You Lord
I will praise You Lord my God
Even in my desperation
I will praise You Lord

And I can’t understand
All that You allow
I just can’t see the reason
But my life is in Your hands
And though I cannot see You
I choose to trust You

Even when my heart is torn I will praise You Lord
Even when I feel deserted I will praise You Lord
Even in my darkest valley I will praise You Lord
And when my world is shattered and it seems all hope is gone
Yet I will praise You Lord

I will trust You Lord my God
Even in my loneliness
I will trust You Lord
I will trust You Lord my God
Even when I cannot hear You
I will trust You Lord

And I will not forget
That You hung on a cross
Lord You bled and died for me
And if I have to suffer
I know that You’ve been there
And I know that You’re here now

Even when my heart is torn I will trust You Lord
Even when I feel deserted I will trust You Lord
Even in my darkest valley I will trust You Lord
And when my world is shattered and it seems all hope is gone
Yet I will praise You Lord